I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize