I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
she told me i tasted like america
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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