So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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