I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize