drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
