guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize