I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
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