If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I think my fart just growled at me.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Randomize
