Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Alive.
So much puke
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Use "feeling words"
Yay
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
