your thong is hanging out like whoa
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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