So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
where are you?
Hypothermia
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
