I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
