David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Randomize
