A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
You were trust falling into bushes
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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