Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize
