Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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