Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
