i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize