i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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