Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
My breasts were aching with rage.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Randomize
