So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
