Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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