i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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