I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Randomize
