My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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