sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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