I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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