Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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