Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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