i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
There's a naked man in my car right now.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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