is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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