Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
you traded sex for a burrito?
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
