Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize
