porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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