worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize