My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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