dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
All the doctor said was why
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
