I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
