It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
