Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
home. puking in laundry basket.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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