I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize
