you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I think I just sharted jello shots
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