Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Betty ford says i'm here all night
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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