did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
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