There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
