Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
