dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize