Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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