what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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