My hand turned me down
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
