Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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