you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Randomize
