Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Randomize
